Manage Stress and Overwhelm During the Holidays? This Was Not on My Christmas List!
The Christmas season is one of my favorite times of year! It is full of joy and wonder and I truly do love all the decorations, movies, extra time at home with my family. Just the overall sense of peace the season can bring really warms my heart. But if we are being truly honest, this season can also be one of the most STRESSFUL times of the year. I don’t know about you, but I find myself constantly wondering how to manage stress during the holidays and keep my holly jolly spirit in check.
The holiday stress and overwhelm can be especially difficult if you are a mom who is juggling multiple responsibilities. With the added pressure of work, family, and Christmas preparations, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed and like you’re not doing enough. However, it’s important to remember that you are doing your best and that’s all that anyone can ask for.
To help alleviate some of the stress, it’s a good idea to prioritize your tasks and delegate responsibilities where possible. It’s also important to reduce the workload when you can and focus on quality over quantity. I know I’d far rather slow down and enjoy the simple moments of the season with my family than be caught up in the hustle and bustle with shopping and gifts.
But wanting to slow down and manage the chaos and actually slowing down and managing the chaos can be two totally different things. That’s why I decided to compile a list of actionable ways you can manage the overwhelm this holiday season so you can focus more on what matters — your family, and less on the commercialized aspects of the season.
Tips to Manage Stress During the Holiday Season
1. Set Realistic Expectations
Managing overwhelm and stress during the holidays starts with realizing you can’t do everything. It’s okay to say no to some things and to let go of some of your usual standards. I know for our family, the first year we had a child, we had to be really intentional about planning family dinners and gatherings. Did I want to attend all of them and see all of our family? Absolutely. But I refused to miss the joy of the season because I was rushing from one place to the next.
Something that has helped us be more intentional is asking family members to try to space out meals or gatherings, host them on the day before or after, or even the weekend before or after. That way we feel like we can enjoy as many people as possible without the pressure to “rush off” to the next gathering.
At the end of the day, you cannot be everywhere at once. The biggest way to manage overwhelm during the holidays is to focus on what’s most important to you and your family, and let the rest go. It’s important to remember that Christmas is about slowing down and spending time with loved ones. If that means cherishing one special meal on Christmas with whoever can be there, and celebrating the following weekend with everyone else, so be it. Christmas is a season and it’s okay to limit yourself when decided where to be on the actual day.
2. Plan and Prioritize
If you are finding yourself stressed during the holidays, make a list of everything you need to do, and then prioritize the items on your list. Start with the most important things and work your way down. Use a planner or calendar to keep track of your to-do list, set deadlines, and plan ahead for holiday meals and what you need to make or shop for. This will help you stay on track and avoid feeling overwhelmed.
I always try to shop ahead of time. I personally do not enjoy going out to the stores at all during the month of December and I hate feeling rushed. I do a lot of shopping online, give gift cards to certain family members, and try to have most gifts prepped and ordered before December 1st. That way I can just focus on wrapping the few weeks before Christmas.
We’ve also eliminated excessive gift giving in my family. Honestly, I am an adult and there’s not a lot that I want and don’t have. If I want something, I can get it myself. I don’t want others to feel pressured to buy me a gift just to fulfill a “commercial holiday” requirement. I’d far rather get together for a special meal and spend time with my loved ones and I love not having the pressure of extra shopping, wrapping, and gift giving. In my immediate family, we give gifts to our parents and I give gifts to my nieces and nephews. My brother and sister and I do not exchange gifts.
3. Delegate, Simplify, and Ask for Help
Don’t try to do everything yourself. Being the one who does it all can be a huge sources of stress for me during the holidays. Ask your partner, family, and friends for help with things like cooking, cleaning, and decorating. This will free up your time and allow you to relax and enjoy the holidays. You deserve to enjoy the season too, momma! Involve your children in the Christmas preparations as well. They can help with tasks such as setting the table, wrapping presents, and decorating the tree.
Something else I love to do is simplify holiday meals! You do not always have to cook a giant homemade meal and leave yourself with a mess of dishes in the kitchen. One side of my family has a holiday tradition of ordering pizza from our favorite pizza place every year. We just throw together a salad and add in some cookies and it’s an easy, no mess meal with little prep or cleanup.
If you do prefer to cook, think about ways to make clean-up easier like using paper plates or cups, disposable pans, etc. Holiday meals can be special even on a Dixie plate, okay? Lol For me, I’d always rather have extra time with my family and not be spending the holiday season washing dishes. Make things easier on yourself wherever you can!
4. Simplify Your Decorations
One big way I started to manage stress during the holidays to by keeping my decorations simple and understated. This is an area I used to go way overboard on but now that I have two little ones, I’ve simplified a lot. This has helped with not having as much for the kids to get into (and end up breaking or tearing up or making a mess) and allows me to not feel overwhelmed by the aspect of decorating. I also want my decorations to be inviting and exciting for my kids and not another item that makes me yell, “No touching!”
You don’t need to go overboard with decorations to create a festive atmosphere. I have one tree that I decorate and I place all the fragile or sentimental ornaments up high so my kids can’t grab them or break them. The ornaments down low are cheap or harder to break. I have two pencil trees in other parts of the house that I just have white lights on and a buffalo plaid wrap on the bottom on a tree skirt. They take 3 minutes to put up after bringing them up from the basement. They add a festive touch to my entryway and kitchen with almost zero effort, and there’s nothing my kids can pluck off or break from those trees. That’s a win win in my book!
5. Don’t Overdo the Gifts
Gift buying can be a huge source of stress during the holidays! It’s easy to get caught up in the gift-giving frenzy, but it’s important to remember that Christmas is not about the presents. Focus on giving gifts that are meaningful and thoughtful, rather than expensive and extravagant. Most people do not want a gift for the sake of getting a gift. A lot of people, myself included, are focusing on having less “stuff” anyway.
Think twice about giving someone something and make sure it’s not just going to be another item in their donation bag a few months after Christmas. One thing I love to do for others during the holiday season is bake or make treats. This isn’t costly, it can be a family activity that you do together, and it’s a consumable item so it’s not taking up space or cluttering the person’s home for years to come.
You might consider donating to charity in lieu of gifts if you know someone on your list doesn’t actually want or need anything. If you really want to give a gift, make sure it’s something they need so you are being intentional about filling a need or want verses just giving them something that’s going to collect dust and add clutter to their home.
6. Limit the Toys
Too many toys can be overwhelming for both children and parents. Limit the number of toys you buy for your children and focus on quality over quantity. Choose toys that are age-appropriate and that will encourage creativity and imagination.
I really like to plan gifts for my kids by following this structure:
- Something they want
- Something they need
- Something to wear
- Something to read
Now, do I only buy them four things? No… but following this format really helps me limit and narrow things down when I find myself getting a little too carried away with “add to cart.”
7. Be Mindful of Your Time
Don’t overbook yourself during the Christmas season. Make sure to schedule some downtime for yourself so that you can relax and recharge. It’s so easy to get caught up in a constant state of “hurry,” but you will really regret letting the season slip by without taking some time to slow down and enjoy it.
Like I previously mentioned, part of this means intentionally planning which gatherings you will attend and which ones you may have to miss. But also be sure to schedule time to just “be.” So often we get caught up in the “doing” that we forget to slow down and enjoy those around us.
Something I’ve decided to do this year is schedule special nights during the month of December with my family. So one night we are having a “Grinch Night,” where we watch the Grinch, wear Grinch pajamas, eat Grinch themed snacks, etc. Planning this ahead of time ensures that it actually happens because believe me, my four year old won’t let me forget… Lol and it also helps with making sure time doesn’t “slip away” while we are busy getting swept up in the hustle of the season.
8. Delegate Gift Shopping
If you’re feeling overwhelmed by the thought of gift shopping, delegate the task to your partner, family, or friends. You can also make a list of gifts that each person is responsible for purchasing.
This is something I’ve struggled with in the past because I’m a bit of a control freak. However, I’m really working on letting go of the reigns! One thing my husband and I are doing this year is going shopping together. Traditionally, I’ve taken care of all of it by myself. I decided it’s gotten to be too much and I really want to share the shopping experience with him anyway.
We decided we are going to make a day date out of it! Grandparents will keep the kids while we spend an entire day shopping together and mark as many gifts off the list as we can. We will be going out to lunch and probably dinner together so it also serves as some good quality time.
If there are any gifts we do not get that day, I plan to try to split the list with him so I am not left overwhelmed with to much on my plate. Again, this is an area I struggle with so if you do too, just know you’re not alone.
9. Take Advantage of Online Shopping
Online shopping can be a great way to save time and avoid the hustle and bustle of crowded stores. Many stores offer free shipping and returns, making it even more convenient. This is how I traditionally buy 98% of my gifts anyway. After becoming a mom, it was just so much easier to shop online in pockets of time in the months before the holidays than to even think about stepping foot into a store with my child or finding a time to leave him to shop.
Now that I have two kids, online shopping is even more convenient! I do plan to do some in-person shopping this year with my husband like I mentioned, but anything that we can order online, we will certainly be ordering online. It’s just a huge time-saver and to be honest, a sanity saver as well.
10. Wrap Gifts Early
Don’t wait until the last minute to wrap gifts. This will only add to your stress level. Start wrapping gifts a few weeks before Christmas so that you can spread out the work. I like to group gifts as I purchase them so I have them all together in one spot. Then when I finish shopping for a particular person I wrap the gifts. That way I don’t have to worry about what I already bought or remembering what else I need to buy because I know when I start wrapping, that person is finished.
Don’t Forget to Enjoy the Season
If you take nothing else away from these tips, please remember this: take time to slow down and enjoy the season. Don’t let the consumerism overtake you and entrap you in thinking this time is all about gifts, buying, wrapping, hurrying, and scheduling. Make time for family traditions such as baking cookies, attending church services, or watching Christmas movies in your pajamas.
If you often find this time of the year overwhelming, remember, you’re not alone. Many moms feel overwhelmed during the Christmas season. By implementing these tips, you should be able to better manage your stress, enjoy the holidays, and create lasting memories with your loved ones.